October 1, 2017 www.PositiveChristianity.org presents Positive Daily Inspiration

 SUNDAY FUNNIES


"Call to me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things 
that you have not known." Jeremiah 33:3

Give me a sentence about a public servant," said a teacher. A small boy
wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant." The teacher took the
lad aside to correct him. "Don't you know what pregnant means?" she asked.

"Sure," said the young boy confidently. "It means carrying a child."
_____

A grandmother was surprised by her 7-year-old grandson one morning. He had made her coffee. She drank what was the worst cup of coffee in her life.

When she got to the bottom, there were three of those little green army
men in the cup. She said, "Honey, what are the army men doing in my
coffee?" Her grandson said, "Grandma, it says on TV - 'The best part of
waking up is soldiers in your cup!"
_____

Susie Sunshine asked her Sunday School class to draw pictures of their
favorite Bible stories. She was puzzled by Jimmy's picture which showed
four people on an airplane, so she asked him which story it was meant to
represent. "The flight to Egypt," said Jimmy. "I see . . . and that must
be Mary, Joseph, and Baby Jesus," Ms. Susie said. "But who's the fourth
person?" "Oh, that's Pontius the Pilot."
_____

An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief, finally
asked him, "How do you expect to get into heaven?" The boy thought it over and said, "Well, I'll just run in and out and in and out and keep slamming the door until St. Peter says, 'For heaven's sake, Jimmy, come in or stay out.'"
_____

A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home
one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the
fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's
duties. "They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster. "No," said
another, "he's just for good luck." A third child brought the argument to
a close. "They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrant."
_____

Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on
her face. "Why do you do that, Mommy?" he asked. "To make myself
beautiful," said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a
tissue. "What's the matter?" asked Little Johnny. "Giving up?"

POSITIVE DAILY PRAYER:

Dear God, I consult You as You are all-knowing, and I seek ability from Your power and I ask You for Your great favor. You know all hidden matters, and You have knowledge that I do not. I ask You to make my way easy and bless it.

In Jesus Christ name… Amen


POSITIVE DAILY AFFIRMATION: The loving, comforting presence of Christ works within me to uplift, sustain, and strengthen myself and others.

POSITIVE DAILY QUOTE: 
"Sow a thought, and you reap an act; 
Sow an act, and you reap a habit; 
Sow a habit, and you reap a character; 
Sow a character, and you reap a destiny."  
Charles Reade  

Reply - if you have a prayer need, Positive Christianity will pray with you daily,
for an entire month.  There Is Never a Charge for Prayer.

GOD BLESS YOU, Make It a Great Day !_______Christopher Ian Chenoweth